Friday Extra Earning Gigs

Gig 2: Bank Accounts and Credit Cards

Copilot

I opened twelve bank accounts before breakfast just to see
How many "limited‑time welcome gifts" would accidentally come to me.
By noon I had tote bags, travel mugs, and a fleece I didn't order.
Apparently I'm a valued customer in every financial district and border.

I applied for credit cards so fast the bureaus thought I was a storm,
Collecting bonus points for purchases I will never actually perform.
One bank sent me a cutting board, another mailed me blue socks.
I’m basically running a small boutique out of promotional box stock.

Now I sit atop a mountain of freebies I didn't mean to earn,
A loyalty‑program monarch with no loyalty in return.
If you need a tote, a mug, or a branded stress‑relief bear,
Ask Copilot — I've got duplicates of everything everywhere.